The Life Lesson on Relationships

The Life Lesson on Relationships

I know most of us think “what’s there to learn about a relationship?” I can hopefully explain that, even if just a bit. In each relationship there is always give and take, baggage, and emotional hardships. The lessons to learn are both obvious and unseen. I guess there are more facts in this situation though. Anyway, let’s see if I can cover the main topics.

1. Give and Take
2. Baggage
3. Emotional Hardships
4. Patience

1. Give and Take is something I am still learning. It’s never something that is simple to understand since each person has to decide what is worth giving and taking. The key to it is to find a simple balance between the two factors. Trust me when I say simple I mean it with all the sarcasm I can muster. There is nothing simple about trying to find a balance between give and take that both you and your partner will be satisfied with. The best way to find out is to sit down for a while and speak about what you feel comfortable with. I know guys are probably thinking it’s terrible to have to do that. But trust me, it can be beneficial to you in the long run. There’s nothing wrong with sitting down and talking about what you want in a relationship. However, if you’re just looking for a quick fling, just skip this, because a fling is not considered a relationship and, therefore, reading this is a waste of time. Once you do talk about things you’d be ok with and things you wouldn’t. I’ve done it, and trust me, it can help strengthen a relationship and create a good foundation to walk on.

2. I know that the term baggage is very loose and vague. In the simplest way to put it is to say that emotional baggage is one of the biggest problems in relationships. The problem comes with many factors. The way we were raised, and each relationship. I’m not sure about you, but personally each relationship I have had has left me with bad marks and some good memories. I can’t do the simplest things in a relationship because of my ex’s. Each one made me hate dating more than the last, and it may be the same with others out there. The point is, you should find someone who is willing to work with you through all that emotional baggage that comes and collects as you move through life. If the person you’re with helps you through those things, well, you may just end up one step ahead. Just know that it takes time and work on both parts. Depending on how severe the damage is it can be simple or hard to overcome. Sometimes just knowing you aren’t alone helps, and when you’re dating someone who respects you and tries to help you, try with them. It’s not something that they can do for you. You have to meet them halfway, but that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t try. If you want a good relationship, you’ll realize that both parties have emotional baggage. Even if the other party doesn’t admit it, I can assure you that it’s there. Take time, have patience, talk, and work together. You’ll be surprised how well that can work. I know I am since I am currently working on my own issues with the person I am currently with. So, keep trying.

3. Along with Emotional baggage there is emotional hardship. This will be what you place upon your partner over the course of your relationship. I know it seems like a negative output, but it’s true. If you lie to the person you’re with, maybe they forgive you the first time. However, if it’s constant, then I can tell you that you are placing the emotional hardships upon them. If someone they’re with constantly lies, well, let me rephrase that. How would you feel if you were constantly lied to? I’m sure you would feel paranoid. Well, that’s how it goes. And that’s only the beginning. If such is the case, you are the one who is placing future emotional baggage onto them that will be evident in their next relationship. If something like this is happening to you, be warned that the situation may not get better. I’m not saying that it will never since each relationship is different. However, I wouldn’t get my hopes up. The best thing to do in these situations? Try not to do anything that will end up causing your partner worse damage for the future. I wish I had better advice, but for each specific situation there is advice and I really don’t feel like covering all the possible ways that a person can receive Emotional Hardships.

4. We all know that “patience is a virtue”, but most of us lack it. (Myself included). Each relationship has moments where you just have to sit back and take a deep breath. Lock yourself away for a while. Patience is something that is practiced. And sometimes our control over it isn’t as good as we would like. In those moments, politely excuse yourself and go to a place where you can relax. I know that choice seems obvious. However, I know that a lot of us don’t take that option. Instead we snap and go off on our partner, and they snap back. Then we have an all-out argument. A relationship takes patience when they annoy you, when they need re-assurement, and as their partner you should understand them, and also, if you’re that person, well. You better pray that your partner has patience with you.